An Xavier Update


It’s that time again ladies & gents, get ready to have your worlds dazzled with captivating information about the amazing things my child is doing. He went to the pediatrician today and got all measured up, he is 19 lbs even, 27 inches long, and has a giant 18″ noggin. The height and weight are average, but the head is giant, 97th percentile! That means only 3% of 7 month olds have bigger heads than he does. I wonder what they look like.

There’s his giant dome there. And the face he made after he got his two shots.  We decided to skip the flu shot. His pediatrician said it takes two weeks after the 2nd round of flu shot to even start working. By then, we’d be in March, when flu season is pretty much over. So we’ll just get one in the fall. He was pretty happy with where Xavier is at as far as milestones, sitting unsupported, rolling, etc.

He has two teeth on the bottom.


And lemme tell ya, those bad boys are sharp. You have to watch your fingers, he’s like a puppy.

The other night, I was changing his diaper and talking to John, and I hear him making this weird sound. I look down and he’s got his frank n beans clamped in his chubby little fist. Oh crap. So we enter a new chapter, and he’s kind of obsessed. As soon as his diaper comes unsnapped, THWAK, it’s all hands on *ahem* deck. I’m trying to ignore it and play it cool.  At first I kept removing his hands and telling him no, but that only made it more appealing, evidently. So I gave up and maybe he’ll get bored with it.

That’s the face John made at me when I said that.

Another big milestone, we are swaddle free! I thought I’d be swaddling this little monster into college. He just wouldn’t even consider it. But the more he rolls, the less safe it becomes. And besides, his big ass was breaking out of it a couple times a night and we’d have to get up and reswaddle anyway. So we just quit, cold turkey. And he’s done pretty well. He doesn’t seem to know what to do with his hands as he’s drifting off. Naptimes are harder than bedtimes.

But bedtimes are harder now too. He got his first cold this week. We had to run out and purchase a humidifier. It was mostly chest congestion and a bit of sneezing, but no fever and he stayed in really good spirits.

He sits up pretty well. He seems to be stuck at the almost point, where he gets excited and falls over about ten seconds in.

I know, he’s so damned cute I can barely stand it.

He’s obsessed with being in his jumperoo. BUY A FREAKING JUMPEROO.

He screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeams, mostly while in said Jumperoo. You probably don’t believe me, but he’s trying to talk. He looks RIGHT at the dogs and says “OG” or “DGGG” or “DAH”  He also growls while trying to say “Hi”. Again, you walk into a room, and he looks right at you and says “HAAAA” or “EEEEY”

The doc gave us the go ahead to start trying meats. Meat in a jar seems unnatural and weird  to me, so I dusted off the magic bullet today and I’m going to try some chicken and apple for him. We’ll see how that goes.

He’s still nursing (YAAAAY!) and we’re still supplementing a few bottles a day of formula. I know that once the 12 week limit is reached with the Reglan, we’ll probably be done nursing. But that’s alright. He eats 2-3 jars or pouches of pureed food a day, plus a mesh feeder snack. His fave is mango. The little booger is batshit for mango.

He’s into everything! We all look like we were mauled by a honey badger, with claw marks on our faces and missing patches of hair from him grabbing and yanking and clawing at us. You can’t take your eyes off of him for a second because as soon as you turn your head, he’s into some shit. He’s SO close to crawling, and when he does…we’re SO screwed.

And here is my favorite picture from this little naked baby photo session.

“Draw me like one of your French girls”

The End.


Playdates & Petri Dishes

It is my completely unscientifically based theory that breastfeeding sucks (ha) all the immunity out of you, and gives it to your baby. Which, hey, I’m doing all of this for that exact reason, I don’t want him to ever be sick, ever ever. But holy crap, can I NOT be sick for a few days?

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am freaking sick. AGAIN. I’ve seriously been sick three times since Thanksgiving, with different, crazy random shit that lands me in the ER. And this time, I’m pretty sure it was something I picked up at Xavier’s playdate on Wednesday. Children are disgusting little petri dishes and carry around more diseases than a third world prostitute. Or your mom. Last Wednesday, I found myself in a room full of cute little germbombs.

If I’m being perfectly honest, I don’t know how much Xavier got out of it. He pretty much just sat in his bumbo and watched the older kids.

And tried to steal his Bumbo Buddy Andrew’s stuff.

And drooled a lot.

The three older kids got a bit more, learning to share and stuff. But mostly, it was nice for the moms to have a chance to chat.

I know, it’s a LOT of cuteness huh?

But under the cuteness, evil lurks. An evil deathplague that attacked four adults and five children this weekend. Highly contagious, apparently. Friday night, it claimed it’s first victim, keeping the dad of one child up all night praying to the porcelain gods. Saturday, it set in around the rest of that household. Sunday I went to work, fine and dandy. Sunday night, I started feeling a big queasy at around 6 ish. I barely finished my dinner, not feeling right.

By 8 pm, I was feeding Xavier his bedtime bottle when I told John “I’m going to need you to take him, right now. I need to go vomit.”

And so I did. And I continued as such until around 3 am. Oh it was awful. PAINFUL. I always forget how much puking sucks. It really sucks though. At 2, John got up to check on me, and I laid there on the couch, moaning, with the trash barrel next to me just in case. He was all “Aww poor thing, this sucks!”

By four, he’s on the bathroom floor himself. The shit sets in FAST.  He didn’t leave the bathroom until approximately 9 am. It was HORRID.

Mercifully, Xavier and my mom appear to have been spared. Monday night, Xavier woke up 3x and just wanted to be held, but other than that he seems okay. Please let it stay that way, because I just can’t imagine a poor little baby going through the horror that was inflicted upon us.

I really need to look into some immunity boosting hippie shit or something. I can’t keep doing this. Also, need a hippie cure for Roxie’s arthritis. Any of my dog owner friends had any luck with things like acupuncture or water therapy? The Rimadyl is working but I worry about her liver & kidneys. More on that later, someone just woke up.

An Xavier Update.

So we went back to the pediatrician today, and I think that means it’s time for an update.  I know it’s exciting, try to keep your pants on.  The last pediatrician visit was sort of sad. He wasn’t gaining weight, and we were instructed to start supplementing with formula. And we have been. I’m still fighting with my milk supply, and I’m still losing. And I was THIS close to giving up entirely. Then I got sick. But Xavier didn’t.

And this is where I’m going to thank boobmilk for that. So I’ve been doing a little bit of research and it appears that there are some moms who don’t pump at all. It looks like I can nurse when I’m home, and not pump when I’m at work (Because seriously, I’m getting such pitiful amounts it’s not even freaking worth it.) and my body will somehow figure it out.  So this week I’m taking it down to two pumping sessions at work instead of three. We’ll see how it goes.  Hopefully it’ll work out that way.

So I was pretty nervous about today’s visit, really hoping he’d gained some weight. It seemed like overnight, none of his clothes fit. I even had to crack open the six month sized stuff, because 3-6 is just all the sudden a joke.

So, his visit today went well. We showed the dr his head holding up skills, how he’s thiiiisclose to rolling over and sitting up. He measured his head. 17 1/4″ , putting him in the 75th percentile for dome size. It’s because of his big brain.

He had also grown a full inch, so he is now 25 1/2 inches long. Which is why none of his damned pants fit him anymore.



Finally , his weight. He was 14 lbs even at his last visit a month ago. But come on, look at how he’s filling out. I knew he had to have gained at least one pound. He gained almost two! He’s 15 lbs, 13 ounces. Woohoo!!!

So. I guess what we’re doing is working. We tried rice cereal a few times a week for the last two weeks. On Thanksgiving night, holy hell. This poor child was so constipated and uncomfortable, we were up until 2 AM trying to comfort him. It was miserable, he couldn’t sleep hardly at all. Finally on Friday, we gave him some prune juice and all was well in his world again.

But since then, I’ve been afraid to give him any more. We talked about that today and the Dr said maybe moving on to a single grain oatmeal cereal, or mixing in some peaches or pears with his cereal would help with the constipation.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am blogging about my baby’s constipation.

So all in all, he’s looking good and healthy and cute.  And, I’m being totally serious when I say this, he is just the best damned baby ever, I got so lucky. During his entire appointment, he was cooing and kicking and giggling. Everyone kept commenting about what a happy baby he is.  Until the actual shot came, then of course, he cried. And I kinda cried but pretended not to. But then like 4 minutes later, he was sleeping and he’s been totally fine ever since. I kinda wish he could just stay this age forever.

In other news this week, I officially turned 30 on Saturday. I actually don’t feel too bad about it, it is what it is, and hell..looking at these pictures, I know I’ve accomplished something pretty fucking amazing.



An Xavier Update.

I don’t have a ton to write about this week. It’s been kinda rough around here, lots of stress going on. This week hit a whole new level of shittiness, John got laid off from his job, and someone stole $200 out of my purse. Lovely huh? But to ice that shit cake a little more, Xavier got a few trips to the pediatrician.  About two weeks ago, I went to change his diaper and found a tiny pink spot, about the size of his dime in his diaper.

Here’s what the inside of my head sounded like :

Omg something is totally wrong with him he’s peeing blood wtf could that even mean call 911 no don’t call 911 call the dr wait what if it’s totally normal, didn’t I read somewhere that it’s totally normal? How can peeing blood be normal, I never do it, do boys do it? Has he been injured and no one told me? Did I see this on SVU as a sign of sexual abuse? How the hell does this even happen? Is it because I didn’t circumcise him? What about that damned hydroceles when he was born, could that be it? GOOGLE IT!! Ah man that’s not good, he’s either dying or it’s totally normal, well that’s nothing I didn’t know before. Guess I’m calling the pediatrician.

So I call. And they don’t say anything but “Can you make it here by 1:30?” And my head explodes. They want to see him right away it must be serious holy crap.

(I am SO cool.)

So, I get us down there, take the diaper. The Dr looks over his beans and franks, and doesn’t see anything. He tells me that it’s probably urate crystals, and sometimes it just happens for no reason at all, and sometimes it’s because he’s dehydrated, and sometimes it actually is blood, and the only way to know is to test it. So they send me home with instructions to collect a urine sample. does one collect a urine sample from an infant? I’ll tell you. They gave me this plastic bag with a hole in it with sticky tabs around the hole. I affix the stickies around his little business, put his diaper back on over the baggie. Then I realize..I have to remove the stickies from his business.

So for an hour or so I walk around, dreading taking this stupid thing off. Surely it’ll hurt, I wouldn’t want a bandaid ripped off my genitals. I try to figure out a way to remove it gently, perhaps if I use nail polish remover, or lighter fluid, that’s good for stickiness? can’t put that crap on a baby! Okay scratch that. Maybe if I just soak it in water? But what if it messes with the sample?

So..I just ended up going reaaaaaaallly slow. And he stared at me the whole time, like “I just don’t know about this Mom”

But I got it. And got it down to the lab. Phew. Oh we wait for results.

The next morning, another spot. A bigger spot. I call the Dr’s office. They say they didn’t find any blood, so it’s just urate crystals. Normal. Yay!  They tell me it’s possible that he’s a little dehydrated, and that I should drink more water. Eesh…fair enough, I definitely do not drink enough water. If it keeps happening, call back and they’ll test the diaper itself to see if it’s blood, further investigate this.  

So, a week or so goes by and it’s all good, I’m chugging water and gatorade regularly, but man I’m still definitely struggling with my milk supply. I’m still taking supplements, pumping and eating oatmeal all the damned time. I’m really trying. But I am still struggling.

So when I see another spot after I’m doing all that, I realize maybe despite my best efforts, he’s not getting enough. I call the Dr again, they tell me to come down. I call the Warmline and tell them all I’ve been doing and that it’s possible he’s not getting enough from me, and we stayed on the phone for awhile..and basically she gave me the “You had a good run, but maybe it’s just not working out for you.” speech.

So we head to the doctor. At Xavier’s appointment at 2 1/2 months, he weighed 13.5 lbs. He’s now 4 months old, and he weighs 14 lbs. That’s not enough weight gain to make the doctor happy. So..he recommended supplementing with formula. confession. When I was pregnant and immediately after giving birth..I really didn’t care about breastfeeding. I had seen a lot of my friends who were all “I’m going to breastfeed, formula is poison!!” and then for one reason or another, breastfeeding didn’t work out and they were devastated, harboring all kinds of guilt and self loathing about it. So I took this “Eh, if it works it works” attitude about it. And if I’m being totally honest, I kinda sorta didn’t want it to work. I saw formula as more convenient, and in my head, breastfeeding kind of grossed me out. (Hippies everywhere just gasped in horror.) I know, logically, that it’s the most natural thing in the world. But in my head it felt dirty.

Until I did it. And THEN it felt like the most natural thing in the world. And it was gratifying and I felt like this amazing earthmomma, nourishing my child with my own body and breastfeeding is awesome, I never have to wash bottles and my baby is thriving and lemme do my hippie dance and be all “It’s natural and beautiful, this is what boobs are for!”

So..when he told me that Xavier is not gaining enough weight, that he’s NOT thriving, I was devastated, harboring all kinds of guilt and self loathing. I still am. Let it be known that I have the happiest baby on the planet, ask anyone who’s met him. He’s super chill, and never acted as if he was still hungry. So I guess he was just doing what they tell us fatties to do and just eating til you’re satisfied, but not full. (I still haven’t mastered that.)  But I gotta shelve my stupid feelings and do what’s best for the kiddo. In the meantime, I’m still pumping around the clock, taking supplements and eating oatmeal. I’m not giving up just yet.

Non-Bathtime Photos Courtesy of Tana Murphy of The Murphys Photography. Her photos actually do my baby’s cuteness justice.:) Link: